Ganbare Goemon Kirakira Dōchū: Boku ga Dancer ni Natta Wake (script)
Intro 1 ???: Today is the Wise Old Man's 98th birthday party... A grand party is being held at the Ninja Mansion in Iga. Goemon: Congratulations, Wise Old Man! Ebisumaru: Hey! Is that girl behind you your young mistress? Wise Old Man: What are you saying?! Can't you see she... Omitsu: Really? It couldn't be that she is a robot? Yae: Now that you mention it, her figure does remind me of Sasuke... Wise Old Man: To say such a thing... Sasuke: I've been discovered! ???: Just then... Wise Old Man: Ah! That must be another guest. Goemon Impact: Hello, it's me, Goemon Impact. Today I have come to say my last farewell... Wise Old Man: Oh my! Goemon Impact is moving by itself...!! ???: And so... Goemon Impact: Until now I was only pretending to be a robot. Honestly.... I come from Planet Impact! All: What?!?! Sasuke: But why do you have to say farewell? Goemon Impact: Well, I received a fax from my home... An evil Athlete called Seppukumaru is causing chaos there! Goemon: The Shit? If that's true then I'll help fight him! Goemon Impact: Thanks for the offer, but this is my planet's problem... Goemon: Forget that! We're going together! Ebisumaru: We're friends until the end! Sasuke: I can't allow Seppukumaru to continue! Yae: Well, let's go! To Planet Impact! Goemon Impact: Thank you! I'm so happy I must dance! All: AH?! Scene 2: A Four-Part Planetary Investigation Goemon Impact: That's the Planet Impact. Goemon: Why does it look so foggy there, like the ruins of a fire? Goemon Impact: According to my analysis, there is some sort of guard protecting the entire perimeter of the planet. Ebisumaru: Just in midair like that... Sasuke: We have to go investigate all those areas surrounding the planet. Yae: Let's divide the investigation work between all of us! Goemon Impact: I need everybody's support here. Goemon: Okay! Sounds like a good plan! Hurry, let's go, everybody! Scene 3: The Chain Pipe Hinarin: I just found this strange thing here in this room... Goemon: Th-That's a Chain Pipe! Hinarin: Oh, this is yours? Well, I am very hungry now. If you give me a Rice Ball, I'll return this to you. Goemon: (D-Difficult Girl!) No problem! Narrator: Will you give the Rice Ball? Goemon: Give. Goemon: Don't Give. Hinarin: Thank you! All right, I'll return this to you! Narrator: Goemon regained the Chain Pipe! Hook onto and swing from the Manji blocks! Goemon: All Right! Whit this, everything should be perfect! Scene 4: Wait, What's That About a Wedding? Yumezo: And now, Goemon and Omitsu's wedding... ah! D-did you defeat the Tanuki? Thank you, I'm in your debt. But how is your strength? Goemon: Since coming to this star. I haven't had my usual strength! Yumezo: If you ask Kinzo in the Oasis Town, he can give you something so you'll be strong again. Goemon: Oh, that's great news! I'll go to the Oasis Town and talk to this Kinzo immediately! Thank You very much! Scene 5: Kinzo Kinzo: Oh! I heard about you from Yumezo! You'll get your strenght back right now. Yaaaaaaaah! Goemon: Whoa! Kinzo: (Huff, puff...) Now you should be as good as new... phew... Goemon: Fantastic! Now I can atack with Koban coins! Narrator: Goemon received the charged koban! Now he feels like he has the strenght of 100 people! Goemon: Thank You! May you have a long life, sir! Scene 6: Oedo, Town of the Bodybuilders [[Itakaro|'Itakaro']]: Ke ke ke! How did you manage to come all the wat here? You must exercise constantly and be in great shape! Goemon: What the hell are you talking about?! Of course i'm in great shape, I'm from Oedo! Itakaro: Ke Ke! I don't understand what you're saiying! But my Mr. Seppukumaru's Bomb... oops! Goemon: Bomb?! What the hell are you talking about?! Itakaro: Ke ke ke... You'll know soon enough! If you leave this place alive, that is! Goemon: Darn it! I'm extremely worried about that bomb! Itakaro: Ke ke... What? You don't understand? Well, for the time being, My giant robot will slice you to pieces! Goemon: Grrrr! I can't worry and be defeated by this loser! I'll call Goemon Impact! Scene 7: Rivals from the Start Ebisumaru: H-He looks just like me! Obisumaru: Oh my--! Wh-What's going on? It's like looking in a mirror! Ebisumaru: Except he's got an ugly nose. It looks like botamochi... Obisumaru: B-Botamochi?! Well, you look like a filthy tanuki, with the big gut jiggling from side to side and everything! I think I look respectable! Ebisumaru: Filthy Tanuki?!?! You're the one with the big, fat, round stomach and face! Obisumaru: Can't you see that I have a beautiful face? Ebisumaru: If you're ugly, you're just ugly! There's nothing you can do about that! Obisumaru: I can't associate with the likes of you anymore! Just listen to this pig whine! Boo hoo hoo! Ebisumaru: P-P-Pig?! Argh!... You'll regret saying that! I challenge you! I challenge you to a contest! I bet I can bring more girls back here than you! Obisumaru: I think not! Very well, I accept your challenge! However, beautiful people only, ugly women don't count! Ebisumaru: Are you stupid or something? I only like beautiful people, and beautiful people like me! Obisumaru: Hoo hoo! We'll see about that! When you hear the cow cry three times, you have to come back here! Ebisumaru: Cow crying three times, got it! I don't have much time, but I will return with beautiful girls! Both: Hmph! Ebisumaru: Well, hey there, young lady! How would you like to come with me for a little while? Eh? Eh? Eh? Girl: That sounds wonderful! I don't have anything better to do, so i'll go if it's just for a little while. Obisumaru: You didn't run away, even though, you can't possibily win a challenge against me! Ebisumaru: I thought you would be jealous if I brought back some girls. Obisumaru: Well, let's begin! Come on, referee! Ebisumaru: I may not look like it, but I'm a regular ladies' man! You're just a small fry! A small fry! Ho, ho, ho, ha ha! (Oink, squeal) Obisumaru: Aaaaaargh! I lost! But how?! My p-p-pride... Referee: Well done! Ebisumaru has won a special prize. We'll give him the Lovely Ballerina Drill! Ebisumaru: Ohh! Ballerina? D-Drill? This is like a dream come true! Referee: With this, you have amazing power! You can dig intro suspicious-looking rocks of grond! Well, please accept it! Narrator: Ebisumaru obtained the Ballerina Drill! The Blue Button let's you spin round and round and grill as a Ballerina! Ebisumaru: Whoa! This is so amazing! It fits me perfectly! Hee hee hee hee... Obisumaru: Quit it! Help Me! Scene 8: Return of the Reflection Shuriken Ninzo: Ah! Are you a ninja, too? How did you did this secret hideout? Well, since you're here, I will give you my favorite legendary shuriken from when I was still young and healthy. Ebisumaru: Ah! That's mine! I lost it when I came to this star, and that's made things tougher for me! I think that reflection shuriken is mine! Ninzo: Eh? Th-This is yours? Oh, ho ho... Well, if you hit the wall, it'll rebound off the wall and come back to you. Let's see if you can do it and this is really yours! Ebisumaru: It's obvious! Thanks for fiding this for me! Narrator: Ebisumaru regained the Reflection Shuriken! This Shuriken can bounce off of walls! Ebisumaru: Well then, goodbye! Scene 9: Eggs + Bombs = ??? Rokudenashi: A, ha ha ha ha ha! Welcome! Isn't it great to play sports non-stop and work up a real sweat? Ebisumaru: Thanks to you, I'm practically dripping with sweat! Rokudenashi: Oh, is that so? Well, we drip with sweat every day because we're carrying poweful bombs in our bodies. Of all things, seppuku... Ebisumaru: What?! Seppuku?! That harakiri thing? Rokudenashi: Oof, how could I let that secret ship?! I guess I have to fight you with my giant robot now! Well, I'm off! Ebisumaru: Why do you have to do this? Well, what can you do, i'd better call impact! Scene 10: Sasuke the Paperboy Devilery Man: (Cough) Unn... I caught a cold, but I have to deliver the morning newpaper, I don't think I can make it. Do you know anybody else who can do this for me? (Cough) It wold help a lot (Hacking) Sasuke: How about me?/Goodbye! Delivery Man: Lucky! Thank you! There are 6 newpapers altogether! You have to deliver all the newspapers before the chicken cries three times. I will give you something great if yoyu can do this! (Cough) Well, good luck! (Coughing three times) Sasuke: Here's your newspaper! Birobiro: Thank you very much! Just leave it there. Sasuke: Phew! Just in time. Well, I'd better head back to that news shop. Deliver Man: Oh! You did a good job! I promised you that I would give you something special... (Coughing) With the pass, you won't have any problems getting past the guard at the edge of town. Well, it's freezing, so don't get catch a cold... (Coughing two times) Scene 11: We're All Bombs, Hey! Bomber: Yah! I'm a bomb! You're a bomb, too! I saw you working very hard this morning. You're a very nice guy... No, wait, the best guy! Am I right? (Bomber is laughing and sigh) Sasuke: What just happened? Bomber: '''Lately, we've been making great big bombs and making lost of money from them! But I'd like to make something even bigger than that! Huge! '''Sasuke: Well, you could power up my firecracker bomb! Bomber: All right, baldy! If you want it, you have to give me 500 ryo first! Sasuke: Y-You want money?! Narrator: Will you pay 500 ryo? Sasuke: Pay./I quit! Sasuke: Please do it! Bomber: Oh, this'll be a piece of cake! (Sasuke pay the 500 coins and Bomber prepare the forces) Bomber: I did it! See, baldy. I made a very powerful Firecracker Bomb! You can shoot huge fireworks with this baby! Narrator: Sasuke obtained the Big Firecracker Bombs! These bombs cause a huge explosion! Sasuke: I'm very happy with this! Well, I'll see you again sometime. Goodbye! Scene 12: The Mysterious Mecha-maniac Sasuke: I have a pass here. Please, let me through. Guard: I see... you have a pass. All right, you can go! However, there are lost of deep canyons up ahead, so you'll have a hard time going through. If you can climb the walls, you might be able to make it. Otherwise, you might as well turn back now. Messenger: Are you Sasuke? I have a special message for you from the delivery man! Sasuke: You can get a mechanical powerup if you come to Tundra Town. Come and see!... Mecha-maniac. Hmmm... I'de better go see what this means! Scene 13: Sasuke the Spider Mecha-maniac: Oh, hee hee... I am not an octopus! I am the Mecha-maniac! Did you see my advertisement? All right, we'll power you up right away! Oo, hee hee hee! Sasuke: I've got a bad feeling aobut this... Mecha-maniac: All right, we're finished! Sasuke: I don't think anything's changed... Mecha-maniac: No! That's not true! You can use your kunai to climb on walls now! You'll be an expert at that, it'll change your entire life! Well? How do you like that? Sasuke: Th-Thank you very much. Narrator: Sasuke gained the kunai climbing ability! Move towards the wall and press the blue button! Mecha-maniac: (There's still I part left over, but i'de better not say anything...) Scene 14: Hairy (and Grumpy) Manju Hatarino: Hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo... Sasuke: (Thinking) Hmmm... What a supicious fellow. Hatarino: ....... Sasuke: (Thinking) He looks like a manju with hair... Haratino: ......... Sasuke: (Thinking) He's not saying anything. He's so quiet, I have no idea what he's thinking about... Hatarino: ........... Sasuke: Hey you! Mr. Hairy Manju! Hatarino: H-Hairy Manju?! Now you've really made me mad! I'm gonna kill you! I'll fight you with my giant robot! Sasuke: Hmmm... is something bothering you? Where'd you go? Well, if you want a fight, I'm not going to run away! I'd better call Impact to help me! Scene 15: Kaizo Kaizo: Oh! Even someone with a tender face like yours has a great weapon like that! It doesn't fit someone like you! Yae: Eh? This Bazooka? Kaizo: Yeah! If I had that weapon, I could have the power of a million people! Well, give it to me! Give it to me! Narrator: Give the bazooka? Yae: Give/Don't give Kaizo: Ga ha ha! Gotcha! I was just kidding... Now that I thing about it, we don't even have the necessary parts! There's an old man in Fubi City, who owns a shop where they sell stuff like that. I ordered something from the last month. Would you go get it for me? Yae: What?! Me? Kaizo: Of course! I'm gonna do you a favor, so you can do this simple thing for me! Well, I'm counting on you! Scene 16: That's What I Want Plasma Man: If you want to pass through here, you need to pay 100,000,000 ryo! Yae: What?! Yae: I understand./I'll kill you! Plasma Man: Very well! Scene 17: Dirty Jobs with Yae Nikuemon: Oh my--! Young ladies shouldn't come to a place like this. Yae: Mister! I need 100,000,000 ryo! Nikuemon: Heh... 100,000,000 ryo, eh? You're so young and you need this kind of money? That's unusual. This job is not what you think. It's not very clean. Why don't you look someplace else? Yae: I Understand, I quit!/Please, I want to do it! Nikuemon: You don't understand. Once you start this job, you won't be able to go back after a while. Is that okay? Yae: I don't care!/That worries me... Nikuemon: Are you ready? Then from now on, you're my slave! I don't want to hear any complaining out of you! Come into the other room and i'll give you your assignment. Quickly, now! This way! Yae: .......... Nikuemon: Forget about yourself! Just do as I say and satisfy me needs. I'll teach you an important lesson! If you go out this door, don't be ashamed, but buy everything I tell you to! Okay! Hurry! Remember everything I'm telling you! Green Onion... Tofu... Shirataki... Beef... 4 things altogether! I'll give you one and a half millon ryo, so get started! There are 3 produced shops. Use your head and spend your money wisely. If you don't buy everything, there will be trouble... Well, my slave! Go to the store! Nikuemon: Oh! Welcome home, my salve! How did it go? Hand over your sack! Show me. Hmm... Beef... Okay! Hmm... Shirataki... Okay! Hmm... Tofu... Okay! Hmm... Green Onion... Okay! Oh Splendid! I knew you could do it! Well done, well done! I must reward you for doing such a great job! Here's the 100,000,000 ryo you asked for! Scene 18: Money Makes the Worlf Go Round Plasma Man: Oh! Oh! The 100,000,000 ryo! Thank you. Ah! It looks like it's all there! You know, since you're such a hot chick. I'll tell you something great! This town's Tub Man knows a lot of great magic! If you flatter him a bit, he'll be glad to teach you something! Yae: T-Tub Man? Understood! I'll be sure to go look for him! Plasma Man: Well then, farewell! Scene 19: The Missing Piece Yae: Kaizo from the Stream Town asked me to come and get something for him... Parts Shop: Ah, I have the part right here, It's very small, so don't you dare lose it! Yae: Th-This is the missing piece? I can barely even see it. Well, thank you very much. Scene 20: Rub-a-dub-dub Tub Man: What're you looking at? Narrator: What are you gonna say to improve the Tub Man's mood? Yae: You're so handsome!/You're so Beautiful! Yae: Oh, you're just so beautiful! I can't take my eyes off of you! Tub Man: Ooh, you understand! You may not be as beautiful as me, but you're pretty cute yourself. I'll give you something G-O-O-D! Yae: Y-Yes, please do... Tub Man: Voila! I'll make you beautiful, and you'll even be able to swim underwater! Yae: Underwater? Really? Tub Man: Yeah! You'll bee like a fish woman! Yae: (Thinking) Ooh... the power of the Mermaid Magic Power is within me now! Narrator: Yae gained the Mermaid Magic Power. Push the blue button white swimming at the surface of the water, and you can transform! Tub Man: Now go forth! The life of a fish woman is the color of the rose! Yae: (Thinking) M-My life... Umm... if you say so. Well, goodbye! Scene 21: Kaizo Revisited Yae: (Hacking) I brought that part back. Kaizo: Oh, you're so late! I was getting tired of waiting for you! Yae: Please take care of this right away. Kaizo: Okay! Just a moment, watch carefully how I do this! Yae: AH! Kaizo: Ooh! Success! Yae: Thank you so much!Well, I think it's time for me to say goodbye and get going! Kaizo: Hey, wait just a minute! You have to give me money! Money! Gha ha ha! Oh, never mind. You're special, so I think one'll be free! Narrator: Yar obtained the lock-on bazooka! Now you can defeat many enemies at the same time! Kaizo: Do you best, Mr. long-haired guy! Yae: I'm a woman! Kaizo: I'm just joking! Scene 22: And You Must be... The Crybaby [[Nyanko|'Nyanko']]: (Crying) Yae: Wh-What the Hell?! It's a monster! Nyanko: (Jumping and Crying) Monster?! What is this? You shouldn't be so stuck up just because you're more beautiful than I am! Yae: Heh heh... ha.. Nyanko: I'm just tired because we've been busy every day trying to stop Lord Seppukumaru from carrying out his "Seppuku Challenge"! Yae: Seppuku Challenge? How strange... Nyanko: (Jumping and Crying) Even so, I have to stop all of you from taking over this castle and interfering with our plans! I've got an idea! I can fight you with my giant robot! Yae: Giant robot, you say? I'd better call Impact! Scene 23: To Planet Impact! Goemon Impact: Oh! Look at that, everyone! Goemon: The fog is disappearing! Ebisumaru: Now we're ready to go to Planet Impact! Sasuke: We're all going together from this point on... Yae: Do you suppose we can find out what that "Seppuku Challenge" is about? Goemon: Bah! Seppukumaru, Shmeppukumaru! I'll make him pay! Goemon Impact: Let's Go! To my old home! Scene 24: Seppuku Sasuke: You! Rokudenashi: Long time no see. I knew you wold come here, so we've been waiting. Nyanko: (Crying) Thanks to all of you, our efforts were fruitless! Hatarino: Lord Seppukumaru is really serious about this. We can't do anything to stop him! Itakaro: Ke ke! If Lord Seppukumaru commits seppuku, this star will blow up! Rokudenashi: But we can depend on you guys. You're our last hope! Sasuke: What are you saying? Rokudenashi: Lord Seppukumaru is an extreme sportsman and loves every kind of sport! Nyanko: But there are some sports he shouldn't do! Itakaro: Ke! Ke! That's why he wants to try seppuku! Hatarino: If he decides to commits seppuku, he would be ending his own life! Nyanko: Well Lord Seppukumaru has to try everything. Otherwise, he's not satisfied... Rokudenashi: But if Lord Seppukumaru decides to commits seppuku, the bomb in his body will destroy this star! Sasuke: Bomb in his body?! Hmm... We have to stop Seppukumaru! Where is he? Rokudenashi: He's on his spaceship, the Sportsman Ship. But nobody knows where that is, exactly... ha ha... Nyanko: We're watching Lord Seppukumaru to make sure he never tries his Seppuku Challenge. Itakaro: Lord Seppukumaru's escaped, and now that we've been seen with you... Ke! Ke! Hatarino: You must go and take care of this! Farewell! Sasuke: We have to search for Seppukumaru! Impact, we have to find him for the sake of peace in space! Scene 25: Final Battle Seppukumaru: Ha ha ha! You are so foolish! You would dare to challenge the great, extreme sportsman Seppukumaru?! You've made me very angry, and that is inexcusable! Planet Impact will easily attract my satelite bomb! All of you, along with this star, we become brilliant fireworks in space! Seppukumaru: Damn you! How can you embarrass me like that?! That won't happen next time! Seppukumaru: Ha ha ha ha! I was just kidding around before, but now I invite you to travel the whole universe! Seppukumaru: Damn it! You're doing very well! But how much more patience can I have? Seppukumaru: I think i've been playing around too much... Let's end this game! Seppukumaru: Damn it! I'm supposed to be a super strong sportsman! Seppukumaru: Can this be so?! ...I see... huh... I think I may have waited far too long to Lord Seppukumaru. You dare to say no to me?! Scene 26: Epilogue Seppukumaru: Son of a bitch! I think it's time for... the Seppuku Challenge! Seppukumaru: This is the ultimate sport! I have to perfom seppuku! Goemon: Oh no! He's still got a bomb in his body! Ebisumaru: Planet Impact will be destroyed! Goemon Impact: I'll take care of this! Everybody get ready to disembark! Goemon Impact: Shuwatchi! Goemon: Impact... I think he's going to die... Ebisumaru: Couldn't we have eaten something first? I don't feel well... Sasuke: I'm filled with regret, too... Yae: No, don't say that! I'm sure he'll come back! Goemon Impact: Seppukumaru! I won't let you do this! Seppukumaru: D-Damn it! Goemon Impact: And now Seppukumaru and I are going to the sun! Thank you so much for everything, everybody. and... goodbye... Seppukumaru: Ah! Seppuku, the ultimate sport... I never thought it would be this painful... Goemon Impact: Seppukumaru! Let me give you some advice... Seppukumaru is not a sport! Seppukumaru: WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?!?!?!?!?! Seppukumaru: YOU IDIOT!!!!! Goemon Impact: WHAT THE-----?!?!?!?! Narrator: Seppukumaru hit impact so hard, he miraculously made it back to Goemon's location... Ebisumaru: Ha ha ha! What's up with your hair?! Sasuke: My stomach's all twisted from laughing so hard! Yae: Oo hoo hoo... It really fits you! Right, Goemon? Goemon: Ah... ha ha! He can be a great dancer and tour the whole universe! Goemon Impact : D-Dancer?!?!Category:Scripts